When bad things have good consequences

I had a lovely young woman come in to tell a story of violence. She was claiming compensation for a specific event of violence. The premise of compensation is that society pays for an injury that results from the violence. Life or "functioning" in psychological speak has got to have got worse as a result of the violence to claim compensation.

She had a miserable life. She lived in our very anglo-celtic town and was from a mixed heritage background. She suffered what we all dread for our children - merciless bullying. She was called ugly to her face because she had obvious racial characteristics thought unattractive by simple, basic, culturally poor children. I felt ashamed to be anglo.

Her mother and father separated and her mother brought her up in way thought abusive in our culture, possibly just "traditional" in her own. Regardless the girl felt unloved and completely alone. She began self-harming with enthusiasm and began acting-out at home. The bullying continued well into high school and she had sex at thirteen to try to fit in. She had sex and just kept going, doing anything to find acceptance.

At a party some eight months ago she was assaulted. bashed by three girls no less. She suffered bruising and swelling around the face and a bleeding nose. Most importantly perhaps she was deserted by every one else at the party. She walked around town for half an hour looking for someone to help. she was taken to hospital by ambulance.

So the outcome was she changed schools and is now popular. She fits in. she has found God and has found her sexual integrity. She was just congratulated for excellent academic success at her new school. what a wonderful outcome!